Ripple Effect

So, this may bum you out for a Friday morning, but I just need to vent/share/ask. The other night, when I picked up Will from the Kids Club at my gym, he told me that one of the kids made fun of him for walking on his toes. And of course, this isn't the first time that something like that has happened.

I thought more about this today when I was listening to a story on the radio about that little guy who's mom made a FB page for him when he told her that he didn't want to celebrate his birthday because he has no friends. According to the page and news reports, he has a sensory processing disorder, is bullied at school and eats alone in the office every day. Thinking about this kiddo, and what he faces every day, just took my already fragile mom-shell and crushed it this morning.

Will and I have been typically very blessed when dealing with his physical challenges. He's got a pretty rockin' personality and seems to make friends quickly and easily. He has a pretty large group of BFF's who've always treated him equally, and at minimum, have NEVER made fun of him for appearing different or sometimes struggling, or even pointed out his differences (as far as I'm aware).

BUT, I don't know what really goes on when the school doors close behind him. I don't really know the level that he's teased or bullied or faces stares, points, taunts or questions. We've always talked about how God makes everyone different and special, and that he can do anything he wants to, just like every other kid, etc., but that doesn't stop him from feeling different. From being upset when he sees that its not as easy for him to climb and run and balance. And it certainly doesn't stop him from having to face the music when someone points it out.

Hearing him say that some kid made fun of him, and thinking about this little Colin, it made me wonder what I should be doing from the bench to rally for kids like Will and Colin. Well, really, what I should be doing from the bench to rally for any kid. Every kid.

I've been in his corner talking to him about how to deal with his feelings from his perspective, but what have I been doing to make sure he learns and grows and treats others with the kind of respect that I pray to God he's treated with when he leaves my sight? Rest assured, just because he knows what it feels like to be different, that doesn't come with an automatic maturity regarding difference in others. And he still has the filter-less innocence that all kids have.

The thought of Will having to defend why his body works the way it does, is heartbreaking to me. He did nothing "wrong" to live with these challenges. And truly, if someone says to him "why do you walk like that"--he might not really even able explain his answer--let alone have another child understand what he's saying.

I want to ask anyone who reads this to help me teach our kids about how to treat every single person they meet. And especially how to treat kids with any kind of physical, cognitive, emotional challenge. Please talk to your kids about WHY someone is different. Those of you who know Will--explain to your little ones what a "preemie" is, and the different ways it can affect kids. Explain what kids with disabilities go through--and help them recognize that struggle. Therapies and doctors appointments, braces and surgeries and medications and pokes and prods. Teach them what it truly even means to sympathetic, and even more importantly, to be empathetic.

I'm asking you to say a prayer for Will and other kids like him. Pray for him to be brave, to be confident, and to know that you love him. Teach your kids to pray for him, and kids like him.

And lastly, I'm asking you share this with other parents. Ask them to talk to their kids about their friends or classmates or teammates who may be "different" than them. Just because they haven't heard about "the kid who...." doesn't mean there isn't one. Talk to ONE other parent for me today, about the conversations they're having with their kids about empathy, friendship, bullying and how they can make a difference.

Help me throw stones to make the ripple.